Timi Gustafson's Blog | The Healthy Diner - How to Eat Right and Still Have Fun Home Page of the Timi Gustafson R.D. Blog About Timi Gustafson R.D. Sign up for RSS Feed Become a Contributing Writer to this Blog Contact Us

Archive for the "12 Weeks to Health & Fitness" Category

No Matter How Often You Tried Or Failed…

You may say: “I have been here before.” In fact, many of my clients express skepticism when I ask them to enter one of my weight loss programs. Why would it work this time when they have tried and failed – often more than once?

In truth, keeping to a healthy and weight-conscious lifestyle does not have to be complicated. There are, however, a few fundamental principles you must understand: Read more »

This Is Your Chance to Get It Right

In just 12 weeks, you can take small but important steps that get back on the path of optimal health and well-being. Find out how you can reach and stay within your ideal weight range, manage your stress, get rejuvenating sleep and enjoy life as it should be.

Week One: Back to basics
Go to Article »

Week Two: A healthy lifestyle is first of all a matter of awareness
Go to Article »

Week Three: Not all foods are created equal
Go to Article »

Week Four: The dying art of home cooking
Go to Article »

Week Five: Connecting the dots between stress and eating disorders
Go to Article »

Week Six: The importance of sleep for your health
Go to Article »

Week Seven: Dining out
Go to Article »

Week Eight: Health and happiness – how they connect
Go to Article »

Week One

Back to basics

Most weight loss and fitness programs fail over time. That is just a simple fact, and many of us know it from personal experience.

However, in most cases, failure does not occur because people don’t have the required strength and discipline to succeed. Against widespread opinion, it is not a simple matter of will-power. What’s often missing is an overall strategy that also allows for inevitable temporary setbacks, which, in turn, may sabotage the entire process.

A lot of folks begin to make positive lifestyle changes, but then fall off the proverbial “wagon.” Consequently, a large percentage tend to give up altogether. My advice is not to keep an all-or-nothing attitude. Of course, setbacks do happen. But failures also offer a chance to start over.

In my book, The Healthy Diner – How to Eat Right and Still Have Fun®, I talk a lot about individual personality types and personal tendencies. I believe that our successes, as well as our failures, have a great deal to do with who we are. Knowing and accepting ourselves, our strengths and weaknesses, is important when we are trying to beat the odds, and even when our best efforts seem to falter. Learning to deal with temporary missteps – that regretfully delicious dessert or that missed workout session – and getting back on track as soon as possible is key. And, last but not least, let’s take it all with a sense of humor. Even dieting should be fun! Well, perhaps I’m getting a bit carried away.

Where do I start?

Whether you have weight issues or just don’t feel on top of your game, a thorough evaluation is always a good start. You need to determine where you are in your quest for perfect health. Your needs may be quite different from those of other people. There is no one-fits-all standard for your health.

The “Body Mass Index” (BMI) is a commonly used formula for health care professionals to assess weight-related risks, such as heart disease, hypertension, diabetes and certain types of cancer. It is, however, only a guideline and does not apply to women during pregnancy and lactation or athletes whose BMI is elevated due to their increased muscle mass. Your ideal BMI value is in the lowest risk category, or close to it, between 19 and 25. Click on this link to calculate your BMI.

No, we are not all created equal!

Human bodies come in lots of shapes and sizes. Often “apple” and “pear” shapes are used to describe certain body types. Carrying extra weight around the stomach is more likely to create health problems than a concentration of fat cells in the hips and thighs, due to the closer proximity to the inner organs. Measuring your “body fat distribution” can serve as an indicator. Measure your waist line at its slimmest point, without holding your stomach in. Women whose waist measurement is larger than 35 inches and men whose waist measures more than 40 inches are at increased health risk due to their fat distribution. Click on this link to find out whether you are in good shape or beyond…

Getting your needs met

Most people know that limiting their calorie intake matters greatly for successful weight management. Before going on a diet (any diet), however, it is most important not to lose sight of your nutritional needs. Don’t just deny yourself food and hope you’ll lose weight in the process. Your body needs food to function properly, and the more wholesome and nutrient-dense it is the better. Click on this link for some guidelines to determine your average calorie needs…

Know your target weight range

The average weight of men and women is generally higher today than it was two or three decades ago. In terms of potential health risks in connection with weight gain, however, it is important to have some guidelines for what can be considered an acceptable range. Click on this link to determine your healthy weight range for your gender, height and frame size…

One last word of advice before you take off…

Please consult with your doctor before beginning this or any other program involving any dietary changes. You may be surprised to learn that as little as 10 pounds of weight loss can have a considerable impact on your blood glucose, blood pressure and cholesterol levels, which in some cases may make it necessary for your doctor to lower your medication.

And here is something else you may want to remember, especially when the going gets tough: Don’t be overconfident when you start out, hoping that extra efforts on your part will bring overnight success. That rarely happens. For a more realistic approach, I recommend a slow but steady pace, no matter from where you start.

Remember that a healthy lifestyle does not require clear-cut distinctions between dos and don’ts. Nothing is forbidden, but everything counts. The importance lies in variety, balance, and moderation. If your typical meals contain high amounts of animal protein, you can add fiber and vitamins from whole grains, legumes, vegetables and fruit. Think of a mobile: Everything flows beautifully when all elements balance each other. Continue to Week Two »

Week Two

A healthy lifestyle is first of all a matter of awareness

Before we get further into the details of a healthy lifestyle, let me make an important point. Being healthy extends beyond the physical aspect of our being. Plenty of people whose bodies are seemingly in perfect shape may otherwise be ill in certain ways. Some are dysfunctional or outright self-destructive in their behavior. Again, others may have to cope with physical disabilities, but they maintain such a great attitude toward life that one cannot help but envy them. Good health is a state of body and mind. Having positive thoughts and feelings can be as important as eating nutritious foods and getting exercise.

I always begin working with new clients by asking them about their lifestyles. Many of them confess that they pay little or no attention to their habits. They are so immersed in their busy schedules that they go through the day as if on autopilot. Naturally, we all need to stick to a certain routine just to get through the day. We could not function otherwise. Even “bad” habits can serve a purpose as long as they give us pleasure, ease pain or are part of our social environment. Problems arise when we lose control or become addicted – often without knowing it.

Of course, we don’t adopt unhealthy habits intentionally. We don’t smoke cigarettes in order to get lung cancer or eat ice cream to get fat. However, many of us willingly take such risks and accept them as a trade-off between instant gratification and long-term effects.

In order to break bad habits, we have to replace them with better ones. Since habits – especially the bad ones – develop insidiously and over time, it is not advisable to apply radical solutions or expect salvation from a “miracle pill.” I cannot stress enough that people should not expect quick fixes.

Mere deprivation will only leave an empty void that needs to be filled in one way or another. It is also crucial that we understand why we have acquired our habits in the first place. Our “natural inclinations” can only be reversed when we are aware of the role they play in our lives. If eating certain foods provides us with comfort or helps us to cope with stress, we cannot simply ignore that need by resisting our urges. We must first find healthier alternatives.

Of course, we cannot always control what happens to us at home, at work, or when we travel. After all, we don’t live alone in this world. The events of the day can sweep our best intentions away. So, before you read on, I invite you to pause for a moment and consider how much attention you pay to your habits.

Keeping a food diary

A good way to observe your eating habits is a food diary. Keeping a food diary is easy. But make it user-friendly! Any notebook, computer or even your cell phone or Blackberry can do the job.

Begin with a survey of your day. A thorough analysis of your eating habits may include a list of questions you can answer right away: When did I eat? How did I eat? Why did I eat? Call them “eating cues.” Ask yourself: Do I eat when I’m upset, under stress, lonely, or bored? Do I eat although I’m not hungry or keep eating when I’m already full? You may also consider the eating style you have developed over time: Do I often eat quickly and absentmindedly? Do I have a mealtime schedule, or do I snack whenever food is within reach?

Most importantly, be honest with yourself. You don’t have to share your analysis with anybody else. As a matter of fact, it is advisable that you don’t “inform the world” prematurely about your intentions to change.

In the beginning, you may find it harder to remember all the food you consumed during the day. That is the purpose of keeping a diary. It is okay to be more sketchy in the beginning; however, you should become more specific over time, especially when measuring portion sizes.

After you have identified what should be the desired outcome (e.g., I want to lose weight to be healthier, live longer, look better, be more active, etc.), apply the appropriate strategies. Write down the calorie amount you want to allow yourself. Next, make sure you keep track of your actual intake, including all meals, snacks, and also beverages. Remember, everything counts! At the end of the day, take stock. Have you met your goals? You can do the same with your physical activity level. If you were successful – congratulations! If not, don’t give up. Try again tomorrow.

Review your food diary regularly. This will help you to better understand your “eating patterns.” Many people have the highest calorie and fat intake when their energy and activity level is at its lowest. That is a sure recipe for weight gain. If you are a late-night-snacker, be aware that more extra calories will be stored in your body as fat, instead of being burned as fuel for physical activity. For successful weight management it is especially important that you match your food intake with your energy expenditure.

Controlling hunger

Different people respond differently to hunger. Some react to the slightest twinge, others wait until they are nearly starved. Filling up whenever you can eat is not a good idea. It tells your body to increase consumption. On the other hand, ignoring hunger signals for too long may lower your energy level to the point where the need for food may result in binge eating. 

On a scale from 1 to 10, ask yourself how strong your “hunger signals” are. When you reach stage 5 to 6, that is when you are not yet ravenous but somewhat hungry, you should think about getting something to eat. Don’t wait until you get to stage 8 to 10. If you fast too long you won’t be able to control yourself when food finally becomes available. Stop eating at stage 2 or 3 when you are satisfied but not yet full. Eat slowly since it takes about 20 minutes for the stomach to signal to the brain that it has had enough. Note that alcohol and caffeine make it harder to recognize subtle hints of fullness.

Be extra careful when you encounter food that is nicely presented at a deli counter, food stand or buffet. A feast for the eyes can be quite seductive. How often do you find yourself eating food simply because it looks good? If you resist your impulses, the temptation will eventually pass – right?

Making time for exercise – get moving!

Physical activity is an essential component for a healthy lifestyle. It is never too late to begin exercising, even if you have been out of shape for a long time. Consult with your physician before you get started. If you have had little or no exercise in a while, start slowly. You can gradually add more to your daily routine. Eventually, you should aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate physical activity (such as walking or bicycling) on most days of the week. For weight loss, you need at least twice this much, preferably 90 minutes of daily moderate exercise. Click on this link to calculate your target heart rate.

Choose an exercise program you enjoy. No matter which one you favor, focus on these three areas: Aerobics, strength, and flexibility. Aerobic exercising, such as walking, running, swimming and bicycling is beneficial for cardiovascular fitness. Gymnastics, weightlifting, yoga and tai chi can help to build your strength and flexibility. Click on this link for some basic information about exercise.

The main obstacle (or excuse) for most people who don’t exercise enough is time. Perhaps your day is already packed with work and other obligations and you find it hard to squeeze in one more thing. If you cannot join a health club or run around a track, here are some alternatives:

• Walk short distances instead of driving.
• Take the stairs instead of the elevator.
• Park the car further away from the office or the shopping mall.
• Do yard work or gardening.
• Walk or ride a bike to run errands around town.
• Go dancing on weekends.

There are many other exercises you can do simultaneously while you work or watch TV, such as leg lifts, stretching or even using your briefcase as a substitute for free weights on your way to the next meeting. Once you have become more active, you may consider joining (or starting) a “walking club” with like-minded coworkers, instead of hanging out with the lunch bunch.

If you find it hard to keep your commitment to regular exercise or get discouraged when your goals don’t seem to materialize fast enough, don’t give up but rather consider the alternatives: What would you gain from letting yourself go? Nothing. So keep going! Continue to Week Three »

Week Three

Not all foods are created equal

Studies on public health issues routinely agree that today’s most common health problems are substantially nutrition- and lifestyle-related. Unfortunately, with all the diet fads around us, many of us are ever more confused about what to eat and what to avoid. Even the government keeps revising its nutrition guidelines in the interest of public health. You have probably heard of the “Food Guide Pyramid.” Several versions of the FGP have been published over the years by the government as well as by private researchers and advocate groups. The most widely known is the USDA Food Guide Pyramid, which was originally released in 1992. This was the first time the government issued a warning about the dangers of high fat foods. A “remodeled” version of the USDA Pyramid is issued every five years. The next update is scheduled for this year.

No foods are “forbidden,” but some are clearly preferable to others

I want to offer a slightly different version of these recommendations with added emphasis on fresh vegetables to be included in every meal and whole grains with most meals – similar to what is known as the “Mediterranean diet.” Foods that are naturally low in fat, high in fiber and dense in nutrients should build the foundation of any health-conscious diet plan. Animal fats, refined flour products and sweets should rather make rare appearances on your plate. You may also want to watch your oil consumption via cooking ingredients and salad dressings. Because of their high content of monounsaturated and omega-3 fatty acids, olive and canola oil may be used more liberally. All others, especially tropical oils (palm and coconut), I advise to apply sparingly.

Even items that are widely considered to be healthy, such as rice and pasta, have also significant downsides. It is called the “glycemic effect.” What it refers to is the speed and degree at which food raises the blood sugar. Refined foods – like white rice and white flour products – have an especially high glycemic effect. Consuming large quantities of these foods may result in rapid blood sugar changes. Elevated blood sugar levels cause an increased secretion of insulin, which, in turn, may result in a drop of blood sugar – a kind of rebound effect – making you to feel hungry again.

For the same reasons, you should not over-indulge in refined and processed snack foods between meals, especially the sugary kind. Excess sugar gets converted to fat and stored in fat cells. Highly concentrated sugar content can be found not only in sweets but in many other items as well, including sodas and fruit juices.

To avoid some of these negative effects, it is advisable to counterbalance high-glycemic foods with low-glycemic ones. For instance, mixed meals that include protein, fat and carbohydrate produce a lower glycemic effect. Black beans in combination with rice or kidney beans added to pasta have a similar effect of stabilizing your blood sugar. I also recommend consuming vegetables, grains and fruits in their natural form, since foods that are eaten whole have a lower glycemic effect than when they are processed, refined or juiced – as in white bread, white rice, refined grain cereals, crackers, cookies, cakes, smoothies and juice.

Portion sizes everyone can understand

Yes, size does matter! Bigger is not necessarily better. Food portions have increased substantially over the years, both inside and outside the home. “Value sizing” may offer more bang for your buck – but in the end your health may pay the price.

Determining portion sizes can be tricky. Nutrition labels can be hard to read for the untrained eye. How big is a medium-size potato? What’s an average bagel? How much pasta fits in a cup? Why do most food packages contain more than one serving? Here is an easier way to get the measurements right:

Three ounces of meat equals the size of a deck of cards. A medium potato is as big (or small) as a computer mouse. A bagel should be the size of a hockey puck. One cup of pasta is the same size as a tennis ball. A pancake should be the size of a compact disk. Three ounces of grilled fish is as large as a checkbook. An ounce of cheese looks like a pair of dice. Two tablespoons of salad dressing fill a ping pong ball. A teaspoon of oil or butter is no larger than the tip of your thumb. One ounce of chips or pretzels fits in the palm of your hand. A cup of fruit is about as big as a baseball. One half cup of cooked rice fits in a cupcake wrapper.

Make a shopping list and stick to it!

The first step to healthy eating begins in the grocery store. All your good intentions will be frustrated if you don’t know how to navigate the aisles and separate the good stuff from the bad. For that matter, you may also wish to plan your meals ahead of time instead of following your impulses while you are shopping. Make a list for the whole day (or week) and lay out a daily/weekly “nutritional map.” And don’t come to the store hungry! You are much more likely to make spontaneous decisions that you later regret if you shop on an empty stomach.

Healthy eating versus convenience

People who recognize the need to make lifestyle changes often complain that they get little support from the world around them. Finding nutritious foods that are “user-friendly” can be hard. Especially for those who travel a lot and spend much time away from home, it can be difficult to maintain control over healthy eating patterns and exercise routines. There is also the issue of convenience. After a long work day, it can be just too much effort to prepare an elaborate meal. Steaming vegetables and cooking wild rice does not sound appealing when you’d rather sink your teeth into a juicy burger. But there are realistic and easy-to-follow alternatives to everyday cooking at home and even when eating out at your favorite restaurants. You don’t have to deny yourself the pleasure of your favorite dishes or search for special resources to begin a healthier lifestyle. In most cases, a few small adjustments can make all the difference.

If you don’t have the time or are unable to control the quality of your food, eat small meals more frequently. Don’t wait until you’re starved and then wolf down a big plate when you finally find the time. Don’t eat large portions late at night.

Try to find fresh foods whenever possible. What comes out of a can or a box is rarely nutritionally balanced and certainly not fresh. If you don’t have access to fresh fruit and vegetables during the day, make an effort to pick up a wholesome lunch or dinner at a quality supermarket instead of a drive-through. Include a wide variety of foods in every meal. Our body needs more than forty different nutrients every day to stay in good health.

No matter how rushed you are, you should take time for your meals and eat them slowly. Of all the things you pay attention to throughout the day, your health should not rank last. Drink lots of water. Coffee, tea, cola and alcoholic beverages are all diuretics and make for poor substitutes for water. In any case, make sure you stay hydrated. Often you may feel hungry when, in fact, all you need is water. Continue to Week Four »

Week Four

The dying art of home cooking

Cooking has been a specifically human activity ever since our ancestors learned to control fire. In fact, we are the only species on the planet that makes the effort to prepare its food before eating it. In the 17th and 18th centuries, cooking was elevated to a work of art. In particular, French chefs in the service of the aristocracy developed cooking techniques so sophisticated, they remain en vogue today. The invention of fine dining, also known as “gourmet” or “haute cuisine,” dates back to this period. Today’s culinary achievements may be just as impressive, but they are mostly confined to the high-end restaurant industry and certain “reality TV” shows.

Everyday home cooking, on the other hand, is going out of fashion. Fast food, pizza, takeout and frozen dinners are increasingly replacing meals made from scratch. With their ever tighter schedules, it is understandable that people try to cut corners wherever they can. It is hard to put a decent dinner on the table after long hours of work, commute and a thousand other odds and ends cramped into your day. With ravenous family members counting on you to perform miracles in the kitchen night after night, it can be tempting to just wing it once in a while.

Cooking is neither rocket science nor hard labor

So, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that cooking is often considered a chore, if not a nuisance. That is a shame, because the ability to prepare our own food is not only a useful skill, but also an important part of a healthy lifestyle.

It is a myth that all cooking comes down to hard labor. There are plenty of recipes available for quick and tasty meals that can be followed by anyone, even with only a minimum of effort and skill. What matters, however, are the ingredients you choose and also your cooking techniques. The quality of your cooking will only be as good as the ingredients you put in.

Stock up on healthy staples

Another problem that often stands in the way of home cooking is planning – or rather lack thereof. Many people are too busy trying to get through their work day to even think about dinner – until they are on their way home. Once they get to the supermarket, they are too rushed to make smart decisions.

Keeping your kitchen or pantry stocked with healthy staples is a good way to avoid bad choices. Start by making lists of essential ingredients you can use for most meals and work from there. Once you have established an inventory of your standard items, you can organize a spreadsheet, or something to that effect, that helps you keep track as they get used up and need to be replaced.

Here is a list of staples you may want to include.

Choose quality over quantity

An important part of healthy cooking is that you do your own food shopping. I do mine. In fact, it gives me great pleasure to visit my local farmers’ market or the produce department of my neighborhood grocery store. I love to touch, squeeze, smell and taste fresh vegetables and fruits and especially bread that just came out of the oven.

I highly recommend using fresh, seasonal and locally grown ingredients as much as possible. Produce that is certified “organic,” of course, is preferable, but the price difference to the regular version may be a consideration. Ideally, packaged food in jars, cans and other ready-to-eat items should be reserved for emergency situations (such as power outages or unannounced overnight guests).

When you get to the supermarket or grocery store, start out in the produce section. Fresh vegetables should be included in most of your meals. You can confidently indulge in locally grown items such as lettuce, tomatoes, carrots, potatoes, green beans, broccoli, zucchini, bell peppers, etc., especially while they are in season. Don’t leave the produce section without picking up some seasonal fruit. Apples, pears, oranges and bananas are usually available throughout the year, although, prices may be higher in the winter months.

You next stop should be the bulk food section. Always keep sufficient supplies of rice, dried beans and lentils. They can be served as healthy side dishes and go with almost all meals.

The center aisles are typically reserved for processed foods. Here you find condiments, dried goods, boxed cereals, etc. Typically, these items have a much longer shelf life than fresh foods, so stocking up beyond immediate use is safe.

In the refrigerated section, you find perishable foods, such as dairy products like milk, fresh eggs, yogurt, cheeses, etc. as well as lunch meats and fresh pastas. Buy these items as needed and always check the expiration dates.

The meat, poultry and fish counters are separate in most supermarkets and provide customer assistance. Look for the freshest items, especially when you buy seafood. Don’t be shy to ask questions about quality and freshness. Even the places of origin and farming methods can make a difference. These foods are quite costly and the quality should justify the price.

Always read the “Nutrition Facts” labels

When you buy processed foods, you should always read the Nutrition Facts labels which are typically displayed on the back side of the packages. Many processed foods contain ingredients you should be careful about, or at least be aware of. For instance, it is advisable to avoid items with excessively high levels of sodium, also known as salt. You can compare brands and pick the ones with the lowest amounts of sodium per serving. Also, watch out for “hydrogenated” or “partially hydrogenated oils,” also known as “trans fats.” Food manufacturers have begun to phase these out, and for good reasons. Regrettably, the deliberate use of many other less-than-desirable ingredients, such as “high-fructose corn syrup,” “artificial coloring” and “sweeteners” (to name a few), is still very common in most processed foods.

Choose lighter cooking techniques

Unfortunately, the benefits you can expect from healthful ingredients can easily be offset by careless cooking methods. In most cases, however, making improvements can be quite easy. Here are a few random examples you can implement right away:

Go easy on cooking oils and fats! They can add tremendous amounts of unnecessary calories. Use Teflon® or other non-stick cooking ware. You can also add chicken- or vegetable stock to prevent burning. Cut back on deep-fat frying and sauteing. Steam, bake, grill or poach the same foods instead. Hold all buttery and creamy toppings. Apply salad dressings, dips and sauces sparingly. You may not think of these as foods, but they add up and you must include them in your calorie count.

Whenever you have a choice, buy items that are labeled “low-fat” “or nonfat,” instead of the regular versions. Food manufacturers offer most of their products with reduced fat content. The Nutrition Facts labels will tell you about the differences, which can be considerable.

These are just a few random suggestions. There are many more simple ways to make your cooking leaner and more condusive to your health. Read more »

Leaner is better

In your pursuit of a more healthful diet, you don’t have to stick to a strictly vegetarian regimen. If you like meat or fowl, you can continue to enjoy it. But, again, a few precautionary measures can make a big difference. For instance, you should remove the skin from all poultry before you cook it. The white meats are less fatty and therefore preferable to the darker parts. If you serve beef, lamb or pork, trim off as much fat as possible, also before cooking. You may even savor a slice of bacon now and then, but make it extra lean Canadian or turkey bacon.

Snacks in between meals can be made leaner too. For instance, if you serve tuna or chicken on sandwiches, go with the versions that are packed in water, instead of oil. Hold the mayonnaise and substitute it with cranberry sauce or mustard.

If you have a sweet tooth, you are not completely out of luck either, as long as you turn to better alternatives. For example, granola bars are preferable to candy and chocolate. Nonfat frozen yogurt is nicer to your waistline than ice cream. Air-popped popcorn beats popcorn done in oil. Juices made from real fruit are by far healthier than any sugary sodas. Even a cold beer on a hot summer afternoon is alright, as long as it is “lite.”

Make time for eating and savor the moment

In our fast-paced culture, most folks are quite oblivious to their eating habits and treat food like fuel to keep going. But taking time to enjoy a tasty meal can be a much more satisfying experience. So, if you are a fast eater, force yourself to eat more slowly. If you eat too quickly and absentmindedly, you won’t be able to keep track of how much you consume. Also, don’t eat while you work, drive or do other things that distract you. Keep in mind that it takes about 20 minutes for the stomach to signal to the brain that it is full. If you eat faster than that, you will literally be “stuffed before you know it.”

And yes, you still need to watch your portion sizes, even when you are having a really healthy meal. Bigger is not necessarily better, no matter what you put on your plate.

In a nutshell…

Healthy cooking does not have to be boring or leave your taste buds cold. Instead of choosing foods you don’t really like, you can improve the nutritional value of your favorite meals by choosing better ingredients and using smarter cooking methods. I tell all my clients that the best way to go on a diet is to work on the quality and taste of their food.

There will always be occasions when pizza or takeout are the most practical choices to feed hungry mouths as quickly as possible. These occasions have their place in life and don’t have to be frowned upon. However, they should be the exception, not the rule. On a regular basis, there is no substitute for freshly prepared, wholesome food – not only for better taste, but, more importantly, for the benefit of your health. Continue to Week Five »

Week Five

Connecting the dots between stress and eating disorders

Stress is a common phenomenon of our times. Most stress experiences, by far, are work-related. According to the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health (NIOSH), a government agency that conducts studies in work-related illnesses and injuries, more than 25% of workers identify their jobs as the main source of their stress. A whopping 75% believe that their work environment is more stressful than it was for their parents’ generation. Stress from work is cited as a factor for the occurrence of multiple health problems– more than financial issues, family concerns, etc. (See detailed study at www.cdc.gov/niosh/stresswk.html)

Of course, not all stress is bad. Stress can be a powerful motivating and inspiring force. Some folks almost seek the thrill that certain stress can provide. First responders, military personnel, medical emergency professionals and the likes typically perform well under pressure – perhaps even enjoy it.

This phenomenon is called “acute” stress. Humans are well designed to cope quickly and efficiently with acute stressors. Our bodies are able to mobilize normally untapped resources in situations of immediate danger. This is appropriate and healthy if it occurs only sporadically and doesn’t last long. Historically speaking, the ability to mount so-called “fight or flight” responses in a split-second has been an important genetic ingredient for our very survival.

However, in the modern world, hardly any of us are forced to do battle with wild beasts any more. Our problem is that we have plenty of new stressors to fight off, most of which we are less prepared for. These are of a more permanent kind, also known as “chronic.” Chronic stressors are perceived threats that won’t go away. Typical examples are abusive workplaces, financial problems, domestic violence and the likes. Unlike acute stressors, which allow for some relief once a particular threat has passed, chronically stressful situations keep us permanently in a state of heightened alertness and tension.

Long-term suffering from chronic stress can eventually lead to a number of negative health effects, such as anxiety disorders, anger and depression, which in turn may be responsible for developing eating disorders, obesity, hypertension, diabetes, heart disease, stroke, cancer and Alzheimer Disease.

In fact, continuing high levels of stress are potentially responsible for a vast array of debilitating damages to our psychological and physical well-being. For instance, chronic stress exposes our bodies to certain hormones, like cortisol, which can lead to a number of detrimental effects. While more research needs to be done on the hormonal impact of chronic stress, we can say with certainty that prolonged stress-related suffering is likely to cause serious harm or accelerate existing damages to our health in numerous ways. It potentially weakens our immune system and makes us more vulnerable to diseases, both of the mind and the body. It diminishes the quality of our lives and may significantly shorten our life expectancy.

Stress as a major cause for eating disorders and obesity

A great number of studies have been conducted to shed light on potential links between stress and eating disorders. Not surprisingly, there are strong indications that stress can significantly influence lifestyle choices and eating habits.

When coping with acutely stressful situations, our bodies use up nutrients much faster than when we are relaxed and at ease. While stress increases the need for fuel consumption, it simultaneously depresses the ability to absorb nutrients, because normal digestive functions are largely suspended. If the digestive system remains in a stress-induced state of impairment for too long, it can give cause to serious malnutrition.

To protect us from starvation, our brains are programmed to respond to energy depletion by sending emergency signals, begging for more food supplies. The longer the stress experience lasts the louder the alarm bells ring.

The warning signs are not the only tools the brain can use to ensure that fuel supplies won’t dip too low. It is also designed to experience pleasure from eating food, known as “satiation.” Words like “soul food” or “comfort food” explicitly describe food consumption as something exceedingly pleasurable. That may help explain why eating food is a common response to stress. It provides us with a welcome sense of relief.

The pleasure responses can be especially intense with foods that are sweet, fatty or salty. This is not by accident. For our distant ancestors who had to survive on what they hunted or gathered, getting their calories was a constant struggle. Foods with high calorie and fat content were extremely desirable. Times have changed, and our food supplies are now plentiful. Yet our appetite for sweet and fatty foods is still very much a part of our genetic make-up.

Sugar, fat and salt are actually quite hard to find in nature, but they are abundantly present in the processed foods and drinks we enjoy every day. We are meant to consume these ingredients rarely and only in small quantities – which, of course, is the exact opposite of what most of us do. What’s worse is that we are ill-equipped to protect ourselves against excessive exposure to these foods. In fact, most of our dietary preferences are genetically designed in favor of food sources with high calorie and fat content and the seductive lures of smells and tastes that go with them. In particular, fast food items and the likes stimulate consumption and can be highly addictive. The disastrous consequences for our health are now painfully obvious. Diet- and lifestyle-related illnesses like obesity, diabetes, heart disease and hypertension have become hands down the leading killers in our society.

Counter-balancing stress-related eating disorders:

There are many important aspects to effective stress management, including physical exercise, yoga, meditation, counseling and so forth. The guidelines presented here are limited in their focus on dietary issues.

Stress and eating disorders have a tendency to build on each other in form of a vicious cycle. When we find ourselves exposed to stressful situations for too long, it can affect our well-being in ways we may not always fully appreciate. Yet, if taking care of our basic health needs is not part of the solution, our neglect will soon add to the problems.

So, here are a few thoughts you should consider when the going gets tough next time:

• Instead of muddling through your stress with a “whatever-it-takes” attitude, take a little time for some TLC.

• Always begin your day with a nutritionally balanced breakfast. Include whole grains and fresh fruits for fiber and vitamins.

• Limit your caffeine intake. Coffee, tea and colas are all diuretics and can get you dehydrated. Avoid sports- and energy drinks. The side-effects offset most of the benefits they promise. Like sodas, they also make you overdose on sugar.

• Stay away from fast food, sweet pastries and other processed foods with high calorie-, fat- and salt content.

• Eat a wholesome lunch, including a generous serving of fresh vegetables. Don’t continue to work, e-mail or make phone calls while you’re eating.

• Drink plenty of water throughout the day.

• Eat a healthy snack, like a granola bar or some fruit to get through the afternoon slump.

• Go easy on cocktails and other alcoholic beverages before and with dinner.

• Switch off the TV, computer, video games, or whatever else can distract you and enjoy a sit-down, home-made dinner with your family. Focus on your meal and those you share it with.

And try to leave your stress behind for a while. It will be there for you whenever you want it back… Continue to Week Six »

Week Six

The importance of sleep for your health

Sleep is a significant health concern and just as important as nutrition, exercise and stress management. While we sleep at night, we heal and recuperate from the wear and tear of our day. Unfortunately, more and more people find it necessary to cut back on their sleep. The consequences for their health and quality of life can be devastating. In fact, sleep deprivation has become such a widespread phenomenon, that some states have enacted legislation that defines “fatigued driving” in similar terms to drunk driving. Lack of sleep is not only a potential health hazard; it affects the safety of everyone on the road and at the work place.

Clinical studies have shown that sleep deprivation can be a contributing factor to a number of lifestyle-related illnesses – among them obesity, diabetes, hypertension and heart disease. Patients with persistent sleep deficits have routinely shown alterations in their metabolism, inhibiting their ability to manage glucose levels by making their cells increasingly insulin resistant.

Sleeplessness can lead to imbalances in the release of stress hormones, such as cortisol. Potential consequences are weakening of the immune system, risk of a variety of chronic illnesses as well as psychological effects, such as memory loss, mood swings and depression. Sleep deprivation may also have a significant impact on one’s life expectancy.

On the upside, there is compelling evidence that a healthy sleep routine can contribute greatly to one’s physical and mental well-being as well as the quality of life in general. Getting sufficient sleep ranks among the best defense mechanisms we have to stay healthy and handle our stress. We function and perform at our best when we are well-rested. We are better colleagues, parents, companions and lovers when we are relaxed and at ease. We face challenges with more energy and resolve and keep negative or destructive emotions at bay. We are less prone to reach for drugs or alcohol to get high or numb ourselves when the going gets tough. In a word, with enough rest, we are more likely to stay healthy and well all around.

Developing a better sleep routine

Like with stress, “sleep management” can be learned. Here are some tips for a better “sleep routine.”

If you have difficulties falling asleep, try to identify the possible causes. You may ask yourself, for instance, whether you work often late into the night or do things that keep your mind engaged. Do you watch TV or movies that entertain and stimulate you? Do you discuss emotional issues or even quarrel and get into arguments before bed time? Do you have any pressing concerns, such as finances, taxes or job-related matters that may keep you awake? Even if some of these issues cannot be brought to an immediate solution, it can help to know the reasons for your sleeplessness.

Avoid foods, beverages and substances that may interfere with your sleep. Eating a snack before bed is not uncommon, and some folks swear by it. A few small bites may be acceptable, but I strongly recommend that you stay away from foods that are hard to digest or are loaded with sugar. Stick to “complex” carbohydrates, like whole wheat crackers or toast. Dairy products are a good choice as well. Milk contains an amino acid called L-tryptophan, which has sleep-inducing effects. Avoid too much protein intake, though. For instance, “restless leg syndrome” (RLS) has been shown to occur frequently in connection with diets that are high in protein.

Some people enjoy a late night drink, or so-called “night cap,” before they go to bed. Although alcohol can work as a depressant and may help to put you to sleep, the impact on your metabolism will most likely result in a withdrawal syndrome a few hours later and cause you to awake again.

Likewise, consuming high doses of caffeine late at night is not advisable. Caffeine is a stimulant that doesn’t wear off for hours. So, your last energy boost should not kick in later than four to six hours before bed time.

Nicotine has similar effects. As a smoker, you may think having a cigarette or cigar relaxes you, but it actually induces stimulating substances into your blood stream.

Avoid physical exercise late at night. Some people exercise shortly before bed time, hoping it will tire them out. The problem is that vigorous physical activity can also make you feel more energetic, which sabotages the intended effect. If you exercise late, keep it at a low level without getting your heart pumping.

Create an environment that is conducive to your sleep. Your bedroom should be reserved for sleep and sex. Don’t make it your habit to watch TV, work or eat in bed. Minimize disturbances by eliminating noise and light as much as possible. If you are a light sleeper and awake easily, you may consider installing window blinds and even wearing ear plugs. Keep your bedroom temperature constant at a comfortable level and a few degrees cooler than the rest of your dwelling. If you get up during the night, avoid exposure to bright lights and keep a dim night light on instead.

Taking time for an afternoon nap (a.k.a. “siesta”) is recommended, provided you don’t have problems falling asleep at night. Daytime rests, however, should be kept short and not exceed 30 minutes.

Attention to your sleep needs is important for your health and well-being in many ways and should be given a high priority. Don’t assume you can handle sleep deprivation for long periods of time without paying a price. Unrecognized or untreated sleep disorders can lead to serious health consequences, which could be avoided with a little bit more rest.

Week Seven

Dining Out

Even the most health-conscious lifestyle must be able to incorporate special occasions every now and then. Having lunch or dinner in a nice restaurant should be a pleasurable experience, unspoiled by guilt or regrets.

True, you have less control over the chef’s cooking techniques and styles when you eat out. But with a little knowledge, you can identify the better choices everywhere you go. In most places, it is perfectly acceptable to ask for certain modifications when you place your order, such as lighter salad dressings or certain dishes to be omitted or served on the side. Overall, however, you should feel confident that a little straying from your dietary routine will be graciously tolerated by your body. (We are talking about special occasions, right?)

The ABCs of “menu literacy”

Understanding restaurant menus is not as simple as you may think. You read the words, but their true meaning is not always clear. Successful restaurant owners constantly try new ways to enhance your dining experience with carefully crafted menu lingo. The primary purpose of handing out menus is not to provide you with detailed information about the food that is being offered, but rather to make (literally) your mouth water – in other words, to heighten your anticipation and increase your appetite.

That is why professionally trained wait staff can seduce you into spending so much more than you had planned beforehand. Let’s face it, you would not care to empty your wallet for mundane items, such as soups, dips, meats, potatoes or pudding. But you are perfectly willing to spend a bundle on “luscious hors d’oeuvres,” “sumptuous entrées” and “glorious endings.” Don’t be fooled! The folks who type up the menu on expensive parchment paper are probably not the ones who cook your meal. So, arm yourself with a little insider knowledge. Here are a few tips for getting around the most common pitfalls:

Red flags should go up when you see words like these: Alfredo, au gratin, batter fried, battered, breaded, buttery, coconut milk, cream, creamed, creamy, crème, crispy, crusted, deep fried, escalloped, French fried, fried, fritter, ghee, in hollandaise sauce, in cheese sauce, in cream sauce, in gravy, with mayonnaise, refried, sautéed, scampi style, sizzling, stir-fried, super-sized, tempura and value-sized (or added value and extra value).

By contrast, you are probably safe when you read descriptions such as these: Baked, braised, broiled, fresh, grilled, poached, roasted, steamed and stewed.

Of course, this is by no means a complete guide and you may add many more caveats based on your own culinary expertise.

Regardless of the precautionary measures you may take, you can’t always assume that you get what you think you ordered. Heavy-handed and careless cooking techniques can quickly offset the benefits of otherwise perfectly healthy choices.

Be mindful that beverages can be fattening and must be considered as well. Most people don’t think of their drinks in terms of calories. But even wine and champagne counts. So do cocktails. Many sodas have excessively high levels of sugar. It all adds up.

As your dinner progresses, you will probably feel exceedingly comfortable and relaxed. However, if you still have any will power left in you at all, I recommend you try to pass on desserts loaded with heavy creams or chocolate. Go for fresh fruits or fat-free yogurt instead. If your resistance breaks down in view of the dessert display, all your efforts you have made throughout the meal have been in vain.

Have a dining-out strategy

It is a great idea to lay out a personal “strategy” before you arrive at your restaurant. What you do depends on your personal habits and tendencies. For instance, you may not want to get too hungry right before you eat out. Have a small snack at home that doesn’t fill you up, but also does not leave you ravenous.

If you have an aperitif or cocktail before dinner, don’t let it cloud your judgment. If possible, place your order before the effects from the alcohol kick in.

Don’t order a dish you don’t want, just because it is advertised. Be extra careful with the “specials of the day.” They often include items the kitchen needs to use up in a hurry.

You don’t have to clean your plate just because you paid for it. If it is appropriate, ask for a “doggie bag,” if not, leave the food behind and savor the memory instead.

When traveling, particularly to exotic places, learn about the local culinary customs. Your stomach may not be as adventurously inclined as your spirit.

Patronize restaurants that are readily willing to accommodate you. Find out what extra services are being offered. For example, can you call the restaurant ahead of time for special orders? Are other foods available that are not listed on the standard menu? Can ingredients and cooking techniques be modified upon request? Can the chef be asked to eliminate or reduce certain ingredients, like fat or salt? Can entrées be split up, if they are too large? Are half-portions available? And so on…

Don’t be shy about getting your needs met! Restaurants value your business and will be anxious to please you as much as possible. They are keenly aware that you have other choices…

So many choices…

Especially in America, we enjoy an incredible variety of restaurants with a rich spectrum of distinguished styles and flavors. In my book, “The Healthy Diner – How to Eat Right and Still Have Fun®,” I have used a rating system (not the usual one with the star and dollar symbols), strictly written from a dietitian’s perspective. My focus is on ingredients and cooking techniques, culinary cultures and ethnicities, and, of course, the healthier choices and alternatives. Here are four representative examples:

Italian

Italian food is very popular in many parts of the country. Its major components are pasta, vegetables, low fat dairy products and olive oil. You find also a rich variety of seafood. However, before you go for the Calamari Fritti, ask to have it lightly sautéed and pass up on the aioli to avoid excessive fat content.

Having a salad to start with (Caesar or any other) is a good idea, but watch the dressings. Creamy dressings may be tasty, but they add fat. A little olive oil on the side and balsamic vinegar are preferable by far.

Garlic bread dipped in olive oil is so yummy… Well, better not.

Minestrone soup is excellent, especially when it is prepared from fresh ingredients.

If you love pizza (who doesn’t), try the vegetarian kind, topped with fresh tomato sauce – and skip the cheese. Yeah right! You tell the kids that!

Unfortunately, all pasta dishes are high in carbohydrates, and creamy Fettuccini Alfredo is the worst of the bunch. A Marinara or clam sauce has lower fat content. Try splitting a pasta dish – they’re often too large for one person anyway.

Great entrée choices are grilled fresh fish, chicken and meats. Less desirable are sausages and sautéed items, such as Saltimbocca and Scaloppine. Most entrées come with vegetables, pasta or polenta. Ask for pasta and vegetables to be served plain, or with just a little Parmesan cheese sprinkled on top. If you have Risotto, skip the butter and the cheese.

Biscotti and Sorbetto, both low in fat, are the better dessert choices. Panna Cotta is tolerable, but Gelato and Tiramisu contain all of the “usual suspects.”

In summary, healthier choices are available in most Italian style restaurants and ingredients are typically fresh. Italian food made from scratch gets a definite nod!

Mexican

Mexican food can be hearty and still healthy. Traditional dishes include plenty of vegetables, cornmeal and salsa.

Regrettably, westernized versions have brought large amounts of fats and sodium into the kitchen. Mexican restaurants in the U.S. are notorious for their huge portion sizes and their sometimes excessive use of cheese, lard and fat.

A seemingly innocent basket of Tortilla chips and salsa can be extremely high in calories, fat and sodium. Guacamole dips are loaded with fat. You are better off with warm corn tortillas and fresh, home-made salsa.

Both Nachos and Quesadillas are made with copious amounts of cheese and meat, which makes them high in fat as well. The traditional Ceviche is much leaner and a good source of protein to boot. Pico de Gallo is an excellent appetizer salad. Don’t spoil it with too much dressing and hold the sour cream.

Tacos, Taquitos, Burritos and Chile Rellenos are all deep-fried items. Some contain more than a day’s allowance of fat. See if the Chile is grilled over a fire, instead of fried. Tamales stuffed with vegetables are preferable to the ones with meat. The better Fajitas are the ones with lean cuts of chicken, beef or prawns. If you order grilled chicken, be sure to have the skin removed. Corn tortillas have less fat than those made with flour.

Most Mexican entrées are served with beans, rice and tortillas. Corn tortillas have less fat than those made with flour. Beans are a great source of fiber. Boiled pinto or black beans are better than refried ones, which are cooked in lard. Spanish rice is high in carbohydrates and somewhat oily. So, go easy on the side dishes as well.

Fruit ice is a classic dessert, but it has lots of sugar. If you crave something creamier, Flan is a good choice. Deep-fried ice cream and Buñuelos contain cream, batter and oil, plus sugar and honey.

For Mexican food, the healthiest choices are clearly the ones with the freshest ingredients and the least amount of fat. Often, the authentic, traditional dishes have the highest nutritional value.

Chinese

Chinese restaurants typically name their dishes after the regional cooking styles of China (e.g., “Szechwan”). Most feature similar staples, such as soybeans, vegetables, rice and noodles.

Appetizers include crispy fried noodles with fried cuts of meats as well as toppings like wonton strips, cashews, peanuts and eggs. All of these can be high in fat and calories.

Paper wrapped chicken is a very popular dish. Health wise, it is a good choice. Although it is deep-fried, the paper seals out most of the oil and lets the chicken steam in its natural juices. However, some of the accompaniments besides the chicken are inherently high in fat and sodium, except for the cabbage and the steamed dumplings, which are alright.

Most soups make good starters. If made with fresh broth, they are typically low in sodium. Less recommended is sizzling rice soup, because the rice is deep-fried, which boosts more fat.

Many Chinese entrées are fried and coated with a sauce, also high in sodium and fat. Wok-cooked items are preferable. Moo-Shu is good, because no oil is used and the vegetables provide enough moisture for cooking. You should ask the chef to omit oil, salt or soy sauce whenever possible.

Choose steamed over fried rice and mix with the juices from your entrée dishes. When ordering combination dishes, help yourself to larger portions of vegetables than meats.

The customary fortune cookies are tempting endings. Almond cookies are high in fat and therefore not desirable. Deep-fried ice cream…? Better pass.

Chinese food can be very tasty and it is relatively cheap. There are many delicious flavors and you can easily overindulge. It is not a light fare and the sauces and dips add plenty of calories too. Watch out for sodium. Wok-cooked and steamed vegetables are usually the healthiest choices, especially when they are prepared without oils and spicy sauces.

The American diner

They are no longer a staple of the American landscape, but there was a time when road-side diners could be found across the nation. They are part of the country’s culinary history, like the ice-cream and apple pie they served.

Well, the milk shakes and malts are still here, reminding us of the days when we did not know (nor care) about fat and calories.

Soups made from scratch beat anything that comes out of a can. If they make it in the back kitchen, go for it. A hearty vegetable soup is your best bet. French onion soup is tasty and warming. Go easy on the cheese topping, though. If you feel a little more reckless, chili made with lean ground beef, cooked in a rich broth and topped with cheese is your best pick.

If you choose a Cobb salad, let them hold the bacon. Add a side order of chicken instead. Keep your dressing separate or skip it altogether.

Hamburgers, hot dogs, chili dogs and hoagie sandwiches are traditional diner favorites. From a nutritional point of view, they are not especially beneficial (but hey!). BLTs are better. Try to curb your enthusiasm and throw out the bacon, hold the mayonnaise, but load up on lettuce and tomato. (Not much left, is there?)

Diner entreés are notoriously rich and oversized, especially when served with fatty and salty side orders. Fried chicken and fish ’n chips are hard to modify to make them low fat. Chicken pot pie typically comes with a heavy filling. Grilled New York steak and BBQ beef short ribs are alright (sort of) when grilled over an open grill (allowing excess fat to drip into the fire). Baked potatoes make better side dishes, as long as you pass on the toppings made of butter, sour cream or cheese. Mashed potatoes, potato salads and coleslaw are all pretty high in fat. So try really, really hard to resists any of them.

If you must have dessert, split one with your table and only have two or three bites. Or have a low fat yogurt instead. (Who am I kidding?)

In order to become a more health-conscious eater, you should not automatically assume that most foods, including restaurant foods, are off limits. The trick is to be smart about your choices. Healthy food does not have to be bland and tasteless. In fact, it shouldn’t. If you feel deprived of the tastes you love, you will not stick to your diet resolutions for long. So, go out and enjoy yourself thoroughly, but stay in control.

You can read about more menus at my “Restaurant Guide For Healthy Eating.”

Week Eight

Health and happiness - how they connect

Are people who are generally more upbeat and happy also more healthy – or is it the other way around? Is there at all a connection between health and happiness? Numerous studies have been conducted on this subject, but no scientific evidence has ever been established either way. What has been shown in clinical trials, however, was that participants with a predominantly positive attitude had on average much lower levels of cortisol (a stress hormone) than those whose outlook was rather pessimistic and downtrodden. No surprise here!

But research has also produced a number of indications that feelings of happiness and contentment may have direct implications for your physical well-being. Cardiovascular disease and negative emotions, such as stress, fear and anxiety, have long been associated. However, the idea that positive emotions, such as love, joy and laughter, could have significant health consequences is a relatively new consideration.

Although, it is not yet fully understood how emotions, both positive and negative, do affect, for instance, cardiovascular conditions, it is clear that such links exist. We know that heart problems are likely to occur when people are exposed to severe stress over prolonged periods of time. Those who handle stress well appear to be far less vulnerable to these effects. Humor and laughter have long been appreciated for their healing powers. Norman Cousins, the author of a book titled “Anatomy of an Illness as Perceived by the Patient,” has described in great detail how watching funny movies and allowing himself only positive thoughts has helped him to recover from a life-threatening illness.

Yet, when we think of happiness, we envision something more, something larger than being able to cope with stress or recover from illnesses. Happiness, for most people, is having dreams and wishes come true, achieving goals and being free from concerns and struggles. And, of course, there is the widespread belief that money can “buy” happiness – at least to some extent.

It goes without saying that a basic amount of financial stability is necessary in life. Ultimately, however, lasting happiness cannot be measured in economic terms. According to numerous surveys, only a minority of Americans name “making lots of money” as their primary goal in life. “Good health” ranks on top, followed by the importance of having friends, a happy family life as well as work that is meaningful and fulfilling. Somewhat surprisingly, most Americans say they wished they had more “time” for themselves, even if that required a reduction in income.

In truth, it probably doesn’t matter so much what you do or what happens to you when it comes to happiness. Running a successful business, writing a novel or creating beautiful art can be exceptionally rewarding – even though they may absorb a lot of time and energy. By contrast, wasting time and feeling bored and uninspired can be terribly frustrating – and yes, also unhealthy.

My guess is that the secret of happiness lies in both, a bit of excitement and a bit of tranquility. And once in a while, it would be nice to have a few moments of sheer bliss added. These don’t come often, but they can happen at any time and when they are the least expected. This is best said by a quote from Ashley Montagu: “The moments of happiness we enjoy take us by surprise. It is not that we seize them, but that they seize us.”

Is it a matter of personality, dumb luck or can you learn to be happy?
While you can’t make yourself feel happy when you’re not, you can increase your “happiness level.” How?

Ask yourself what would make you happy
When asked, most people seem to have a pretty good idea what it would take to make them happy: If I could get this promotion or this dream job, if I could afford this car, this house, this vacation, send my kids to college, or could save up enough money for retirement, etc., …then I would be happy.

Some of these wishes may come true, others won’t. The trick is to embrace what is real and let go of the unattainable and elusive. You can only be satisfied with what you have, not with what you wished you had. Learning to look for happiness in your reality instead of your dreams is a good first step.

Understand what keeps you from being happy
It is one thing to feel dissatisfied, but another to recognize the reasons behind your unhappiness. It is hard to change your situation when you don’t understand what makes you unhappy. Sometimes, a departure from an unhappy place, a dissolve of a dysfunctional relationship, or simply a change of scenery will do the trick. In many cases, however, we carry the reasons for our unhappiness inside and, thus, bring them along wherever we go.

Take control
If you are not happy with certain situations or choices you’ve made in your life, you can either change the circumstances you’re in or change the way you feel about them. Either way, you have take responsibility and take action. Keep in mind that staying passive and not doing anything at all is a choice too and has its own consequences.

Work first on the basics (nutrition, exercise, managing stress)
Making changes requires a position of strength. Your physical and mental health is an important part of that. If you are dispirited, depressed, exhausted, sluggish and the likes, you cannot muster the energy you need to turn things around. Eating a healthy diet is as important as physical exercise and avoidance of drugs, nicotine and alcohol. If you have a tendency to use any numbing substances to escape your unhappiness, quit that sort of behavior by any means necessary. If you find yourself under a lot of stress, deal with constructively by taking care of your health needs first.

Focus on the good
Especially when you are seriously unhappy, making yourself focus on the positive things in your life can be a stretch. Yet, that may be just the right medicine. Make an effort to be grateful for what you have and make peace with past disappointments. Visualize what can be, not on what could have been. If you allow your negative thoughts to linger, you won’t be open for new experiences. This includes forgiveness. Forgiving those who have wronged you is not something you must do for their benefit, but for the sake of your own healing.

Do things you are good at
Feeling unappreciated ranks high among the many reasons for unhappiness. In fact, unemployment, underemployment, menial and boring labor together with abuse at the work place are all sources for severe stress. Being unable to find challenging and inspiring work is a particularly painful experience for young people who are anxious to start their careers and put their talents to use.

If you find yourself in this kind of situation, exploring other outlets for your creativity can be helpful. Doing things you’re good at, even if they don’t pay off in monetary terms, can still be gratifying and also take your mind off other misgivings. Being part of something bigger than yourself, e.g. by volunteering for a worthy cause or sharing your skills through teaching can have many rewards and will do wonders for your self-esteem.